Thursday, October 09, 2008

Not So Perfect

You know those commercials for facial cleanser on tv? The ones where the woman with the perfect complexion is in a perfectly white terry cloth robe, in her perfectly clean bathroom, with her hair perfectly held back from her face in a perfect knot or perfectly smoothed back by a headband, no random hairs sticking up in little tufts making her look like a guest alien on Star Trek. She has one of those beautiful bowl sinks that look gorgeous but takes up all your available counter space. It's perfectly clean, no water spots or toothpaste smears, & is on a smooth equally perfectly clean counter top. She gets the tube for cleanser from some unspecified location (can't tell where but there is no counter space for it so there must be a hanging shelf somewhere), washes her face and leans forward, cups her hands full of water & in one perfect motion, splashes the cleaners off of her face. No water splashes on the counter or gets in her hair or dribbles down her arms, soaking the robe. Then you see her with her hair down, dabbing at her face with a thick white towel.
Why can't I ever wash my face like that? Even considering that I have no bathrobe, & my sink is molded into my 15 year old bathroom counter, with water stains, and none of my towels are white (and many are not thick) and my hair does stick up around my headband so I do resemble an extra in the Star Wars canteena scene (especially once I get the cleanser on my face), you'd think after a couple decades practice I would be able to splash water on my face without it going all over the counter, the floor & myself. Really. Cup water, lean forward, bring hands to face at full horizontal position. But no.

25 comments:

Kresta said...

Hilarious!!!!!!!

Amy said...

Oh my gosh...you set the scene so well, I am dying.

ummm...I wash my face like that...don't you???

jessica said...

LOL yes I know the commercials...usually like the clean and clear ones. I bought that little cleaner thing that kinda vibrates and you put those little pads on it and they get all foamy and are supposed to deep clean right? Well they do not produce any foam at all and they dry my skin and make me break out worse then before. I am 32 years old and my skin is dry and oily and Im breaking out now worse then I ever did as a teenager. It sucks!!

Jay @halftime lessons said...

VERY well dissected, girl!!

Jay

Kathi said...

LOL!!! The exact reason I only was my face in the shower!!!

Jenny said...

I don't know what your problem is, but I ALWAYS was my face like those chicks on the Noxema commercials. *snort* :)

Purpled Sky said...

LOL -- real life should be like those commercials, perfect.

Monique said...

LOL, so true! I have the same problem, I almost wish I didn't have to wash my face so I can avoid the water mess... lol. Thanks for the laugh!

Woman in Training said...

I can relate! And hard water stains just add insult to injury.

For what it's worth, I think those Star Wars babes are hot!

Jennifer said...

OMGosh,that is soooooo funny!

Colleen said...

Yeah, I can't do that either. You're not alone, woman! I think splashing water on your face without completely dousing your shirt is next to freakin' imPOSSible!

Jenni Jiggety said...

LOL! I make a horrible mess every night when I wash my face! There's nothing pretty about it!

Diana said...

Hahaha, this had me cracking up, I can so relate!

-Diana

Chels said...

LOL!

Shannon@Vogue Mum said...

I know!! I am right there with ya!

Shannon
Vogue Mum
Rock Star Maternity
Domestic Engineer's Union

mrsbear said...

lol. All I can say is, I relate. Then there's always the face cleanser residue that remains in the sink bowl because the drain is too slow.

Yeah.

Tina (mummifiedx5) said...

My problem is that every time I go to use my cleanser I can't find it because the damn teenagers keep using it!

Kristen said...

I never understood how they can wash their face and still be wearing makeup after?!!! We are obviously missing out!

Tess said...

Yep, you know those women have seen tons of botox and probably have someone to wash their faces everyday anyway!

Creative Junkie said...

Hey Stacey! Nice to see you! I didn't realize this was your blog!

This post made me laugh ... I never thought of it before, but you are so right!

Lori said...

It takes me longer to clean up the mess AFTER I wash my face than it actually takes me to wash my face! And all those chicks in the commercials STILL HAVE MAKEUP ON after they're done! Such crap!

Deb said...

i think i nodded through every single word of your post... especially the part about the water running down your arms!!!!! i get my sleeves wet and i also get a little wet patch at the neckline of whatever shirt i am wearing. plus i am too paranoid to wash with no washcloth. i am too afraid of not getting every single bit of cleanser off. and what REALLY stinks is that after washing so diligently and messing up the whole bathroom, my face still has wrinkles AND the occasional pesky zit. grr...

Semi-Slacker Mom said...

That's too funny!

Farrah said...

ROFLMAO...I see it PERFECTLY!!

Paula said...

I swear, you just described what I go through washing my face!