Thursday, March 17, 2011

My least favorite holiday

St Patrick’s Day.

I’ve never liked it.

And I’m at least one quarter Irish. (possibly more, we’re not sure of the exact country mix on my dad’s side)

All the 25 cent draft green beer in the world cannot save this holiday for me.


Two words.

Cooked cabbage.

This is the part were all the better blogging books say I should illustrate my statement with a photo of said cooked cabbage.

But I can’t.

I  loathe cooked cabbage so much the very sight of it makes me slightly queasy.

The smell of it makes me seriously nauseous and if you put me within 500 yards of cooked sauerkraut I will throw up from the smell.

Always something of a problem when you grow up in a family that is Irish and German.

Hate cabbage?

How can you hate food?

“Easily”, I moan from my Gran’s back porch, where I am laying in the hopes the wind will blow the offensive smell away & my head will finally clear.

“Stop your overacting and get in here and eat your dinner” would come the voice of my mother or father.

They did eventually reach a point where I could refuse the cabbage or sauerkraut, but I still had to sit at the table & eat with them.

“Fine, skip the cabbage, but you will eat the potatoes & meat”

“But they were cooked with the cabbage! They taste like the cabbage!”

The smell is so overwhelming to me even the Wonder bread tasted like the cabbage.

(Other kids wanted to grow up so they could stay up as late as they wanted. I was just hoping I would survive long enough to finally be able to refuse to eat things I hated, but I was fairly sure the cabbage would kill me long before then)

When I was pregnant with DS1 and the office cafeteria served cabbage I would have to leave around 10:30am, when the cooking smells made it impossible for me to stop retching.

“Sorry Boss, can’t make that 1pm projections meeting Tuesday. It’s kielbasa & sauerkraut day in the cafeteria.”

I’ve been known to leave restaurants upon learning that cooked cabbage is on special that night.

I’ve been known not to enter them in the first place because I can smell it from outside.

Cooked cabbage is pretty much required by  law to be served on St Patty’s Day.

Photos of recipes of it are everywhere on the internet.

The smell of it wafts from restaurants onto the street.

I don’t need to wear green today.

I already am green just from the ambiance.

We’re going out for sushi, it’s pretty much the only place I feel safe eating today.


Darcy@Somewhatmuddledmusings said...

ACK! Does this mean I need to remove you from my google reader and friend's list?! It's my favorite fun holiday! Helps that we're really into the music and culture anyway - but to hate St. Pat's day just because stupid people cook cabbage?! (hey - I hate the stuff, too, but never let it deter me from having fun today!)
*sigh*. I'll forgive you this once.

Heather Aynne said...

I LOVE cooked cabbage with corned beef and I LOVE sauerkraut. Unfortunately, the smell of cabbage cooking turns hubby's stomach so I've learned to go without unless I have the money to go out. It's sad but he's worth it!

Sugar Mama said...

I went out to eat the other day at a restaurant that was serving cooked cabbage and corned beef as their special. The place smelled SO bad. I wanted to have dessert, but couldn't get past the smell. I do love sauerkraut though. ;o)

Rinda1961 said...

LOL! What a great post today. I actually love corned beef and cabbage. Not a drop of Irish blood as far as I know, but I love Ireland (been there twice and going again next summer).

LosingBrownies said...

I hate stewed cabbage and sauerkraut, but I like cabbage when it's grilled with a little bit of salt.

Michelle said...

I don't mind the cooked cabbage so much. My problem in high school and college was that I had red hair so every guy thought it was "Kiss Michelle Day", whether I wanted them to or not....ewwww. Now, I have to worry about my daughter who is 12 and has red hair. I hope the guys are not as forward as they were back then.

SciFi Dad said...

I'm an equal opportunity hater: I despise cabbage in all its forms.

Lizziemade said...

I don't mind cabbage, but detest it when it's boiled to death. However, I do hate that "old boiled cabbage" smell and can sympathise...
We don't really celebrate St. Paddy's day. Even so, I have never heard people in England talking about cabbage for St. Patrick's day. It's all Guinness and shamrocks and green shirts here. Today we ate out for dinner and sat by the window. A number of people went by, wearing Guinness hats (tall like a top hat, with a white top - like the froth - and "Guinness" written on the side!), with green shirts; otherwise I haven't seen much evidence of St. Patrick's day at all (and our town does have a large group of Irish ex-pats). Maybe everyone was hiding at the Irish Club, or waiting until the evening, to go down the pub, get tipsy on Guinness and have a sing-song!

Never mind Stacey, it'll all be over by tomorrow - you can go back to your cabbage hating without censure!

Brenna @ Almost All The Truth said...

Lol. I am so not a fan of cooked cabbage either. It looks bad, it smells, bad, it tastes bad. But I do like St. Patrick's Day. I have been able to keep the cooked cabbage out of our family's celebration of the green holiday. :)

Andrea @ The Creative Junkie said...

OMG, I am so with you. The smell of cooked cabbage just makes me want to rip the nose off my face and bury it in the back yard. BLECH.

Beverly said...

LOL Hope you smelled not a whiff of cooked cabbage yesterday! If you think that smells bad you should come to the South and smell collards cooking! Visiting my grandparents on the farm as a child I saw many a fly hanging on the window and door screens attracted by the sweet (?) smell of collards cooking lol yep, pretty stinky but ohmygoodness they are soooo good!

humel said...

I have Irish in me, too - hence the hints of red in my hair, the green eyes, and the freckles! Cabbage? I can cope with it. Baby cabbages aka sprouts? BLEH!! And yes, the taste gets into everything else in the whole house when those little blighters are cooked! So I can feel your pain xx