Wednesday, February 09, 2011

Maybe we can get it out of the way now?

I’m thinking Havoc is starting his teen-rebellion-goth-phase a little early.

8 being a little early in my mind.

Havoc wants his ear pierced. Maybe both, maybe just one so he’ll have a non-sore ear to sleep on.

I like that he is considering that his ear will be sore for awhile & ways he might cope with that. Obviously he has put some thought into this.

He wants an axe or a sword or a ninja earring, though he understands he has to wear a basic stud for 6 weeks.

“Boys can have earrings. They are not just for girls.” he tells me.

And I can’t argue with that because it’s true.

One of his male classmates recently had an ear pierced when he went with his teen brother to get his ear done.

Then I came home with grey nail polish and Havoc wanted his nails painted because “Grey is a boy color. Like black. Boys can paint their nails, not just girls.”

And I can’t argue with that because that’s true too.

Boys can also have long hair if they want and some boys even wear EYELINER!

He prefers black or dark clothes. He’s moody & introverted at times.

You see where this is going right?

Goth.

I’m going to have the only 8 year old goth in primary school.

I painted his nails over the weekend. Mayhem wanted his done too but in the end never found the time to sit still long enough to get them done.

We have not gotten Havoc’s ears pierced yet though. Ear piercing has to happen at the mall & the mall is an hour away & we rarely go to the mall. So even if I said “yes” wholeheartedly, it wouldn’t be happening with alacrity.

I am of the opinion that they are his ears & he is probably old enough to choose whether or not to jam a piece of metal through them & then take care of the resulting wound. He also has to pay for it out of his allowance. I’m not a fan of the idea just because I am the one who will have nag him to clean his ears & the one that will have to deal with the inevitable infections.

DH has not weighed in one way or the other, except to admit that yes, in college, he did have his ear pierced & Mommy gave him some sword earrings once. He also had long hair & occasionally painted his thumbnails black.

Grandma though has some strong opinions about it.

“No way in HELL” being the short form.

Grandma is 71 and in her world view boys do not wear earrings, or nail polish or make up or have long hair. Unless they are in 80’s rock bands and even then, those things are only permissible as ‘stage costuming’ not for wear in everyday life. Only  girls do those things regularly and Grandma already has 2 granddaughters & feels that is enough. Grandma will be ‘so disappointed’ if Havoc gets his ear pierced.

And I’m fairly sure that guilt trip was directed at me every bit as much as at Havoc.

Havoc found this information perplexing, not understanding what his cousins have to do with his having his ear pierced and said he’d make sure not to wear them around the grandparents.

Thus coming early to a conclusion I was 14 before I reached.

“Don’t ask, don’t tell.”

Honestly? If this is a necessary stage in his life, lets get it over now while he is gregarious & oblivious and save me dealing with angsty teenage ‘you don’t understand. I need to be an individual’ BS that will so totally be met with mockery by one or the other of his parents, who have been there & done that.

So Monday I sent him off to school in his black jeans, with his black hoodie and grey nails. If he still had the blue avatar hair from this summer he’d have made quite an impression.

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The kids at school laughed about the nail polish but according to Havoc it was the same as when he did tricks on the trampoline to make them laugh.  He didn’t feel teased or anything. He didn’t ask me to remove the polish, which I had been expecting. He still has it on, though it’s all scratched up from playing. He’s decided that is why boys don’t usually wear nail polish.

Boy games are too hard on a manicure.