Sunday, April 23, 2006

forgiveness

That is the topic for this weekend's prompt. That got me thinking about the last paragraph of my previous entry, which I wrote not knowing there was a prompt this weekend. Can you forgive people for frequently irritating you? Do you need to? Is it a big enough issue to warrent a 'forgiveness' as a opposed to just shaking your head, accepting that this person irritates you, and moving on. Is accepting & moving on in itself forgiveness? That is more or less what you do when you forgive someone. You accept what happened & move on. I can't say that I have often said "I forgive you" to anyone. I've said "It happened, its over, lets move on". Which is sorta the same thing, but not quite. There is no absolution in it, the way there seems to be in saying 'I forgive you.' I have said it when people have apologized, but I have never really though "i forgive that person for thier actions." without them saying they were sorry. I've let a lot of stuff go. I've trusted again where I have been betrayed before. I have accepted certain things are the way they are & that certain people are the way they are & gone on.

I think with the board situation forgiveness is not going to work for me. Mostly because it is a constant thing. Things happen, people overreact or screw up or use poor judgement, that is to be expected. You make mistakes but you learn from those mistakes. yeah, soemtimes you have to make the mistake a few time sto really learn the lesson. But to do it all the time, to always overreact, to always belittle people, always be as nasty as you can in certain situations, is another thing. Forgiveness for me requires some regret in the other person, some sign somewhere that they know their behavior hurt someone & they don't like that they did that. If you never show any regret, or always making the same excuses for your behavior with no attempt to change, I can't forgive that. I can let it go personally & accept that you are just not a very nice person IMO, but I can't really forgive you for it.

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